How to reform zoning
Not everyone has access to the same tools and methods. One or more of these 10 strategies will work for you.
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The American Planning Association has published some articles in recent years about considerations for land use reform. Frankly, I think the approaches they’ve broadcast are too complicated and time consuming.
Here are 10 ways to improve Planning's powerful pile of paperwork—the zoning code. Choose the method that's right for you.
Shredding. The most common method. Cut zoning codes into strips or fine particles, making it difficult to piece together.
Shredder. The least common method, requires access to a known menace and possible security from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Controlled burn. Incinerating your zoning code in a controlled environment completely destroys it, leaving only ash. As a safety measure, douse the hot ash with the tears of NIMBYs.
Pulping. Soak zoning codes in water and chemicals to break it down into pulp, erasing any readable content about forbidding abundant housing.
Chemical decomposition. Use a household liquid like bleach to clean and dissolve zoning codes. (The binder can be reused.)
Composting. Now that urban farming will be legal, allow your zoning code to biodegrade in a neighbor's expanding compost pile.
Grinding. Industrial grinders pulverize paper into fine particles, making them a fun display during a zoning reform ceremony.
Sandblasting. A high-powered approach that involves the public works & police department's graffiti removal team. Obliterate your offensive zoning documents with a show of righteous force.
Acid bath. Submerge policy documents in acidic solutions to break down the fibers and ink, effectively destroying Euclidian zoning.
Laser incineration. Zoning reform process that uses extremely high temperatures to eradicate policy documents.
Legalizing mixed-use neighborhoods, watching housing become abundant, hearing stories of people mingling on the streets with each other... Your planning department will rejoice when they realize the public service they've done by abolishing zoning.
The day after Cincinnati's City Council launched their new Connected Communities plan (to be voted on later this year), I listened in on a planning commission meeting where the small-scale developer of a 19-unit apartment building, opposed by the street's other residents and with a lukewarm reception from the larger neighborhood, sought approval. Several people spoke up in support. Council voted to approve the new development, to their credit.
I expect this ambitious overhaul will face more such opposition as it rolls out, but I'm proud of my city's leaders for plowing ahead. Here's the plan: https://www.cincinnati-oh.gov/planning/connected-communities/
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